I need funny quotes for toilet paper rolls as gag gifts.?

one I have is....Dad you're the greatest and deserve the best, I got this special paper for your bathroom quest.

Answers:

1You could have fortune cookie quotes on the paper. Or even better, MIS-fortune cookie quotes.

Other ideas:

Comments about what the person ate are good.

"Hmm, you've had corn recently, haven't you?"
"Is that blood? Damn! Time to have a colonoscopy!"
"Wow. This smear stinks! Do you eat Nothing but cheese?"

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